Remembering the Beginning

Published October 31, 2012 by Dawn

The Honeymoon Phase

You know how it is: two people fall in love and get married, and then shuffle off to an exotic beach for a week or two. The only thing they intend to do while on the honeymoon is consummate their marriage and enjoy each other. No other worries are allowed to enter into the sacred time of togetherness.

I’ve never had a real honeymoon, not in the sense that others have. But in my relationship with God, there was definitely a honeymoon phase. A time when I was allowed to get so enraptured with my love for him that nothing else in the world mattered as much as my relationship with God. I wish I could say that it lasted forever, but I can’t. But while it lasted, it was so sweet.

I could feel his eyes on me. I could feel him smiling at me and loving me. The only thing I wanted to do was bask in his presence and enjoy his attention and affection. The God of the universe, the creator of everything, was looking at me and loving me. I needed someone to love me, and He did! That fact alone was worth everything the world had or could ever offer.

The only clear memory I have of that time was enforcing a bed time. I had to get my kids in bed by eight every night so I could spend time in prayer and worship with my heart’s desire. God was so faithful, too. He spoiled me in that time. His presence enveloped me every night, and I sat beneath his tender gaze and poured all the love inside of me out before Him. All the love I hadn’t been able to give to anyone else, I finally poured out at the feet of my Lord.

It felt so good to pour out all that I had been holding in so long. I’m not talking about love in general. I loved my family and my kids. I’m talking about that special love you save for  someone who just seems to complete you. There is a special love inside of us for that special relationship. I hadn’t been in any special relationships, so this love had been shut in for an eternity, it seemed.

When I came into relationship with God, I was able, finally, to pour it all out! There was such freedom! Because as I poured forth that dammed up love, I was able to be poured into. And I was. God poured his love into me unceasingly. I was overwhelmed by Him. My love was being consumed by God, and He was flooding me with love in return. For the first time in my life, I felt full. All the empty spaces were filled and I was overflowing with an unquenchable love. Springs of living water? Absolutely.

My dry, parched heart was filled. The ache of emptiness subsided. The pain of loneliness dissipated. To say that I was content is a great understatement. I was overcome with joy! To think, I was thirsty until I found this fresh spring and drank til my heart’s content. The last thing I wanted to do was get up and walk away. This spring of love coming from my God was my source of nourishment and strength. This love was all I ever really wanted in life.

 

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