When I lose my mind …

Published August 22, 2013 by Dawn

A few Sundays ago, a man at my church sang a song that took me way back. It was a song I heard when I was a young girl that I used to just rock out to. You know, a song that speaks so highly of Christ and tells your salvation story so well. A song you can’t help but dance to. And I couldn’t. I was up on the platform, sitting with the rest of the worship team and couldn’t contain myself. I was dancing in my seat! I have to admit, this is not the norm. My church isn’t exactly charismatic, doesn’t worship like that at all …. Like, ever. But I was lost in the joy of this song to Him. I wasn’t thinking of anyone else but the Lord and the truth that was being sung. I was thoroughly engrossed and enjoying myself.

When he finished singing, I let out a whoop so loud in exaltation to my God, and clapped like a fool. The lady next to me shot me a look that silently asked, “Have you lost your mind?” With no defense, I had to silently admit to myself, “Yes, I have.”

I don’t know exactly what was going on inside my head at that time. I was lost in the worship and joy of my Savior. I love what Christ has done for me and inside of me. Sometimes, I guess I just lose my mind a little. I try not to. I know it’s not cool to do that, and definitely not normal. Or socially acceptable. I’d apologize, but I know it may happen again, and then what?

One of my favorite stories in the Bible is the story of David dancing before the Lord as he brings the Ark of the Covenant back into Jerusalem. His wife Michal looks down from a window and sees David outside making a fool of himself and thinks, “He’s lost his mind!” She actually despised him so much in that moment because of the scene he is making. After all, he is the King. Seems he should have a little more pride and dignity, right? When the celebration was over, David went home and Michal jumped down his throat about it. Forget the tight-lipped glare. She gave him the what-for! “How the king of Israel has distinguished himself today, disrobing in the sight of the slave girls … as any vulgar fellow would do.”

I love David’s response. I have prayed for this level of devotion for many years. He said to her, “It was before the Lord … I will celebrate before the Lord. I will become even more undignified than this, and I will be humiliated in my own eyes. But by these slave girls you spoke of, I will be held in honor.” I have to admit, I was a little embarrassed after all was said and done, by my behavior that Sunday. Humiliated in my own eyes. But in that moment, I was worshipping Him recklessly.

I came across this verse in 2 Corinthians that speaks to such displays. Second Corinthians 5:13 says this: “If we are out of our mind, it is for the sake of God. If we are in our right mind, it is for you.” Honestly, this verse says it all. What the Lord did for me, what He ransomed me from and the price He paid to secure my heart and my eternity, blows my mind. I can’t get over it. And sometimes, I just get a little nuts about it. I forget any one is around and I lavish on Him and I allow the fullness of joy to spring up in me. Sometimes, I pray to Him without regard to time or the noise I may be making. Sometimes, I dance or clap or shout. I’m not thinking about anyone or anything else. Just Him. And I express the love that overwhelms me in a way that may seem a bit … overwhelming. I don’t mean to be offensive or distracting or ridiculous. I just have a temporary lapse of reasoning. All the other times, the times of composure and soft worship and whispering to Him … in other words, when I’m in my right mind … that’s all for you. I don’t want to freak you out or drive you away so I contain myself until I get home. There’s plenty of time to dance around and shout to Him while I’m cooking or cleaning. My kids don’t mind. So if you will, please overlook my random acts of insanity. I just lose my mind a little when I think about what He’s done for me!

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